REINVENTION: Big Buzz Word

25 Sep

Everyone seems to be ‘reinventing’ themselves. It’s a buzz word. I’ve lived through decades of buzz words coming in and going out and this is one of them.

For a long time I was NOT a reinvented Baby Boomer!

I was married for 30+ years, raised a family, and was just settling IN to the empty nest, free time, some money for a change, and travel options! I was living the life! I had done the work and ahhh … now …. Coasting through the balance of my life seemed delightful.

And had my life not taken an unexpected, dirty and deep dive to the worst place I’d ever been in my life, I would never have reinvented myself. Why would I? Things were good! I was living the American Dream.

I had two choices when devastation took over … as we all do when these things happen. Stay depressed …or finish up the pity parties and get AHOLD of myself! My inner self! My SPIRITED self!

So for those who are still happily married in long term relationships, enjoying retirement or one upcoming, you haven’t done any real reinvention.

When you go through devastation, you get to talk about it! Particularly when you have chosen to MOVE ONWARD and UPWARD rather than so many who stay depressed until life’s end.

We’ve all had trials and tough times. It’s when it is devastating, unexpected, and completely eradicates the life you have lived … that’s when you can choose to reinvent yourself … or as most do, nothing.

Anyone can talk about it, but those who have LIVED it are the ones to whom I listen. Even though there is finally an experts industry association where people intentionally choose to do business with integrity and without violating the rights of others, it doesn’t mean that people will … or are! It’s a choice.

If you’ve done the same thing all your life (career wise) or decades worth, that’s not reinvention either. There is nothing wrong with anyone’s life really. It’s what we DO when the chips are down that brings out reinvention and courage.

What IS reinvention anyway? Per Webster’s … (reinvent) bring back into existence.

For me, the 17 year old, feisty actress, model and singer was reborn at 55! She was put on the back burner, by choice, to take on another role … mother, nurturer, friend, lover, wife, community leader, etc., etc.

It took me 10 years to find her and LET HER OUT!!!

If you’ve always had the same career, same marriage, and done the same things pretty much, that is NOT reinvention. Nothing was lost. Nothing went out of existence that is now coming back. And it’s not reinvention if you haven’t made exponential changes in your life (business, bank account, etc., still making ends meet).

So like anything else, we must be mindful of who is doing the talking, who is guiding us and why, who are experts, and who are not. I will say you could be a reinvention expert IF you interview those who have reinvented themselves.

For launching your own unique self-reinvention … find someone who has any of these qualities below (and I am sure there are more) and I’d bet you are good to go. If they are alive and kicking, they’ve likely reinvented themselves!

Causes of Reinvention: Death in family (spouse or child), primary caregiver by surprise of older infirmed family member, bankruptcy (lose everything), homeless, deathly illness, divorce, addiction, accident.

What other scenarios would you deem ‘cause for complete reinvention?’

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1st Boomer Queen Goes to War!

11 Sep

Ballad of a Crystal Man from Album Fairytale, Donovan Leitch, 1965

Viet Nam your latest game, you’re playing with your blackest Queen
Damn your souls and curse your grins, I stand here in a fading dream
For seagull, I don’t want your wings, I don’t want your freedom in a lie

At 20, the 1st Boomer Queen actually  WENT TO WAR! She served as a flight attendant (nee stewardess) flying US troops in and out of San Francisco via Travis AFB to one of several points in Viet Nam with overnights in Hawaii and the Philippines.

It wasn’t WAR she was after! It was the ADVENTURE of flying East and earning an income from that. A lover of travel, even now, some 50 years later, the cost to go East far exceeds heading West.

On her 6th trip (2/month) the Queen stood at the aircraft door at the top of the stairs staring out into the darkness. Service men already deplaned, she chatted with an AF officer while sipping coffee. During conversation he asked “do you know what a bunker is?”

“No” said the Queen and then he pointed to the edge of the runway where a small wooden hut sat … not much bigger than a dog house in the States. “IF you hear a siren,” he said, “run like hell to that bunker!” Within 30 seconds of his pointing, a siren blast heaved into the night sky so loud and profuse it lifted me off the ground!

Down the aircraft stairs I ran, Ann Klein skirt hiked up and heels clicking across the runway, I was last out of the aircraft and second one in the bunker! the first was a former German track star, Heidi, for whom no one was a match in speed.

As we ran across the runway we instantly became aware of a hand grabbing ours, and pulling us along. We each had a US service man looking out for us first, and themselves second.

Into the bunker we tumbled. The queen lost her shoes! Her rich brown Hawaiian tan was a bit scraped on her arm from the dive. She crouched with the hands of troops over her ears as the rockets went off, one, two and three. Finally quiet.

The Queen never took another trip into Viet Nam. Landing in condition ‘gray’ was too much and she put in for a transfer.

As she looks back on it all, there was a marked difference in the troops she brought in … and the ones going home.

Going in … nerves and lots of new, raised tattoos, and chatter.

One year later, going home … quiet … nervous hands, no talking, smoking and praying.

At that time the only females in Viet Nam other than the few medical staff, only stewardesses experienced war in this way.

Now some 50 years later, yet 11 years since we felt a sense of war and loss in our own country, the Queen is grateful that as a baby boomer she went to war so she could empathize today with those who suffered loss a short time ago.

The 1st Boomer Queen holds the light for those gone and those left behind that we never experience such an adventure again in our lifetime.

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Meet the 1st Boomer Queen

6 Sep

1st Boomer Queen and 1st to Cross the Line …. What line?,  you may be thinking.

The FINISH Line!

Born in 1946, I am and always have been the consummate leader, innovator, a ‘doer,’ a teacher, a speaker, a singer, a mother, grandmother, friend, mentor, author … all of it!

At 65 years I completely reinvented myself BEFORE THE REST of the BOOMERS! That’s right!

When no one knew about the Innocent Spouse Law, I found out and told everyone! [click that link to read Jason Alderman’s article on Huffington Post].

I did all this so YOU up and coming BOOMERS don’t have to TRADE years or YOUR LIFE to learn what I already know.
No one was there to TELL ME! I’m here to help you!

What law?  The innocent spouse law … you know when married couples separate and you are convinced and believe staying married will best serve you, and you end up destitute?

Tens of thousands of boomer women have been left alone (divorce, death, etc.) after a lifetime of service, with NO MONEY, NO HOME, and NO SKILLS!

I listened to my husband of 30 years! I did what he said and got myself completely taken ‘to the cleaners.’

MY BIG AHA!

The IRS contacts me and says “you owe us $80,000 AND we’ll accept $5k/month in payment.” How lovely of them! All I was making was about $1200 a month!

How did that happen? Simple. My then husband filed BANKRUPTCY!!! So guess WHO the IRS comes after when your husband files? YOU!!! Yes, ma’am!!!

CHOICE: Sell everything and be homeless …  OR dig my heels in and DO SOMETHING INNOVATIVE!

WHAT DID I CHOOSE? Heels, baby, heels.

I was a good wife and mother, always worked part time, and did my share. Why should I live on the streets after 30 years, I ask you?

WHAT I DID: Found a TAX ATTORNEY!

WHAT HAPPENED: After one year working with the lawyer, and $5000 later, $50,000 was REMOVED. “That leaves $15k for you and $15k for him to pay,” he said.

I got quiet. Not easy for me, if you know me or someone like me. “This is a great result. Do you want to appeal,” he asked. “YOU BET I DO!,” I said.

NEXT: 6 months later and $1800 more, ALL $80,000 was REMOVED from all my CREDIT REPORTS! 

BUT WAIT … IT GET’S B E T T E R !!!

What?? I didn’t mention was that the State also came after me for an additional $20,000?? That’s right, a total of $100,000 on MY SHOULDERS! The good wife and mother. The one who didn’t see anything like this coming my way. JUST LIKE YOU!!!  Why should I? When I married, we had joint checking accounts, and didn’t consider divorce.

RESULT: The State followed the path of the IRS and I was FREE AND CLEAR OF DEBT! I also had no retirement, home, or car. But I was ALIVE and WORKING!

THE BEGINNING OF A NEW LIFE: Bought my first home at 61, in my own name — a dream home on a lake — for $185K (regularly $285k), and live there still.

THE MORAL? Don’t trade valuable and precious years reinventing the wheel. Because I created new paths of change, you can bounce back in a New York minute!!

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About Leslie Flowers, the 1st Boomer Queen

I have lived in North Carolina for 35 years. I have held various jobs, including serving as a flight attendant for U.S. troops during the Vietnam War. Throughout my life, I have been a student of spirituality and personal transformation. I have read Napoleon Hill, Dale Carnegie, Stephen Covey, Jerry and Esther Hicks, and plenty of others. I have always believed that anything is possible for people who are willing to aggressively work on themselves. I get inspired and lit up by helping people find their gifts. Last but not least, I always look forward to Sundays with my two children and four grandchildren.

How I am helping other Boomer Women

I help people tap into their infinite potential and prove to themselves that they are capable of more than they imagined. I do this in facilitated group coaching sessions, where people learn to use the power of the mastermind to harness their latent personal power. Women who have been through my workshops find that they are able to make as much money as men—or more. This is just one example of how I help people create performance breakthroughs.

I was trained by Bob Proctor (thought leadership), Steve Siebold (speaker certification), Christian Simpson (coaching), Michael Nicholas (coaching), and Roddy Galbraith (speaking). I also completed Landmark Education’s full curriculum for living and leadership. I have incorporated the best of what I’ve learned from the world’s best teachers and built my own distinct coaching methodology. I am truly doing what I love, and nothing gives me more fulfillment than helping others create lives that they love!

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